Anyone who’s read any of my blog posts over the last year or so, has been a witness to my ranting about how unnecessary politicians have become in the actual running of our country. Among those I’ve been most been most scornful of has been the king of the “snappy tie” crowd, Speaker. John Boehner. Since that time Mr. B has grown tired of listening to the yapping multitudes, resigned, and headed to the nearest bar, never to be heard from again. (We hope)!
Now we come to the issue of the 2016 election, the media, the money, and the biggest political mess most of us have ever seen.
On the Republican side, it begins with the fact the Republican led House and Senate have been the least productive and have the worst approval ratings in history. Not only have they not been able to accomplish much of anything new, they haven’t even been able to maintain the status quo without huge fights, shutdowns, threats of internal wars and all manner of internal disputes.
This brings us to a platoon of presidential candidates and the possible reason that most of the tried and true guys like Lindsay Graham have gone straight to the bottom of the barrel while Ben Carson and “Teflon” Don Trump are at the top! Next, we have the highly staged Republican debates and the probable reasons they sound and operate more like a neighborhood street brawl and less like an actual debate!
Teflon Don seems to be the one everybody wants to shoot at, obviously because he’s the one who has pissed everybody off! Next in line, following close behind, is the media because according to Trump, Cruz, et al, they’re not asking the right kind of questions or asking them properly! Number three is Mr. Priebus from the RNC who is hated by everyone for no particular reason! He gets the blame for pissing everybody off and not dictating what questions the media asks, even though he’s not supposed too! Number four and completing the circle in this mess is the big money donors like the Koch Brothers who are funding a large portion of this fiasco and have to be slamming their heads into the wall when they look at the results they’re getting for their money which is pretty much the opposite of what they wanted! Obviously, they wanted the candidates to suck up to the media so the media would suck up to the candidates! Instead, the candidates are telling the media what they can do with their questions which hurt the medias feelings and they might not want to play any more!
Tonight, (while the Broncos are pounding the Packers we hope) the Republican political contenders are having a private meeting to discuss how they want to be treated by the media, the RNC, the donors, and all other interested parties! Mr. Priebus has not been invited and I don’t know if the media has or not! This should bring about an extended round of discussions which might take months and by that time, the election will already be over! We’ll be saluting President Sanders or President Clinton (if she can stay away from another inquisition by Howdy Gowdy) and we can settle in to four more years of political bliss!
Do not despair! I may have a solution to the debate dilemma and it goes like this!
Why not run a Republican political debate like we run an NFL football game? We can set up some rules, hire some referees, sell a bunch of advertising, pay out some ridiculous salaries to folks like me, charge eight bucks or so for a warm beer, and voila! We’ve created a brand new industry!
Since camera time is the premium, all infractions you cause will cost you camera time and question quality.
For instance, any time spent acknowledging accomplishments of our current President will could cost you two minutes of camera time.
Too much time spent badmouthing your competition or accidently telling the truth, will cost three minutes of camera time.
If you wear a horrible tie or spend too much time telling folks what a badass you are, will cost you five minutes camera time and you’ll have to say nice things about the career of Hillary Clinton!
Throwing a dead chicken at the moderators will get you a debate disqualification and you’ll have to spend a day with Teflon Don’s hairdresser!
I imagine we have to work on the finer details of this a little, and I haven’t had time to fine tune it yet with Mr. Priebus, Fox News, or the RNC, but I believe it has possibilities!! Some might say that it’s more than they’ve got right now!
Have a great week everybody!
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